Emotional intelligence is a popular term in psychology that reflects a person’s ability to control their emotions, as well as understand and accept the emotional mood of others.
The development of this ability helps us understand ourselves better and build effective and healthy relationships with others. The higher your emotional intelligence, the less likely you are to come into conflict, and the more stable you will feel emotionally.
Here are some ways psychologists advise to boost your emotional intelligence:
Do not suppress emotions
When something unpleasant happens - a break-up, problems at work, argument with friends, in most cases we try to distance ourselves and distract ourselves from those feelings and emotions that arise. People suppress their emotions in many ways - alcohol, drugs, TV shows, food, social networks.
We run straight into all of that, trying to escape from our emotions, while psychologists advise us to live through them. The more we suppress unpleasant emotions, the longer they live inside us. It is necessary to accept what hurts us and to live this pain in order to get rid of it.
There are no other escape routes - live through your most unpleasant feelings in order to let them go.
Keeping a diary is a great tool for knowing yourself and tracking your emotional state. It increases awareness and develops emotional stability.
At the end of the day, answer the following questions in your notebook:
What have I learned today? What did I have to face today? What difficulties did I have to overcome? How has this contributed to my personal development? What did I learn about people around me?
Track your emotions
Listen to yourself on a regular basis - what emotions you can feel, what worries you or what excites you, what are you feeling right now... Be attentive to your emotional state, understand how emotions affect your thoughts and actions.
Watch the emotions of others
Learn to pay attention not only to yourself, but also to the emotional state of other people - try to see it in their actions, words, behavior. Before you condemn someone, think about what guided the other person, in what condition they could be.
This develops empathy and helps to interact better with others. It is also useful for understanding your own feelings.
Keep up the conversations
We often do not listen to other people and during a conversations with others we often speak to ourselves, leading a monologue. Start practicing mindfulness in a conversations - listen to what others want to tell you, and how you react to certain words.
Dialogue is the exchange of emotional experience between two people. Each one of you speaks about his own experience and life and raises important questions. When you start listening to the feelings and emotions of others, you will begin to better understand yourself and develop your emotional intelligence, which leads to more stability, helps you to cope with stress better and live in harmony with yourself.
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