You know things would change for a few days, but as soon as you stop being vigilant enough, this very person will hurt you again.
People do not change that easily, especially those who are “okay” with the way they behave.
You feel like you can no longer trust them. They let you down and disappointed you. You are afraid they will do it again - because deep down you know they will.
Maybe they have begged and promised they would change. At such moments, they could say anything you want to hear. They could do everything to fix the problem and calm you down for a while, then continue to do whatever they want. Even if you do back, do you really think you can easily open your heart to them again? You can try, but your subconscious mind will build high walls around you, the existence of which you will not even suspect. Even if you decide to make the same mistake again and let them “crawl back to you”, you still won't have the same things in common. You will not be willing to open up, to talk freely and tell them about your secrets and deepest experiences. You will keep your fears and joys to yourself. The communication will suffer. Why? You know why. They never really listened to you. They didn't care what you had to say, they did not pay enough attention.
Think about it: was this ever the person you could rely on? Every time you needed their help or support, they were not there. And I can tell you where he was at that time - having fun with his friends. He had more important things to do. He was always somewhere nearby, but not where he needed to be - not in your arms.
When you were sad, you were forced to fight your demons alone. Yes, you should be able to solve your problems on your own, but you should never be or feel alone in a relationship. He should have been there to give you comfort. He should have dried your tears and hugged you when you cried. Do you remember what it was like to sit next to this person with tear-stained eyes and hands trembling with anger and indignation? Do you remember how bad it felt, and he did nothing to help? Never go back to the person who wants everything from you, but who does not care about you at all. After all, this is exactly what narcissists do. He wanted you to take care of him, and he himself did not offer anything in return. He never gave you enough attention and was always jealous if you had anything else to do. Because of this person, you may have alienated yourself from all the people who loved you. But was it worth it? Was his false love worthy of abandoning those who really cared about you? When your mind is clear to think clearly again, just remember that you agreed to less than you deserved. Remember the pain of neglect you endured every day. Would you allow the same to happen again?
Never go back to someone who swore they would change, but they never changed. Never believe their words, because words alone mean absolutely nothing.
Do not try to go back to the person who broke you, because this is the last person on the planet who will be able to heal you. You will resent the decision for the rest of your days. You may not notice it, but you will never be the same again. This person belongs to your past, not to your present. They are a clear example of everything that a loved one should not do or be. They are the personification of everything you do not deserve to happen to you.
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