Depression does not happen only in those whose lives are full of problems and sadness. Nobody is immune to such a painful disorder. If a person is depressed, every little thing hits them very hard and the problem is not seen as it really is.
Depression is a disaster. People fall out of life, it has a negative impact on their families. Depression is also bad for the entire health. You can say that you're depressed because life hasn't gotten better. But sometimes people suffer from these disorders even if their life is quite good: they have friends, work they love and happy relationships.
Nobody's life is easy life
You need to do a multidimensional analysis: do you have friends, close relationships, a career, do you do something useful in your spare time, do you have problems with alcohol, drugs and other behavioral disorders (sleep disturbance, lack of nutrition) that can lead to pathologies? It is important to differentiate between all of these and make behavioural adjustments wherever possible. But sometimes we come across people whose lives are so neglected that it is not clear where to start.
The meaning and place of a person in life...
Every time you move forward and what you wanted happens, it means that you are moving in the right direction.
You got a bad score on your exam. And you think, "Why am I at this university?" Maybe that's not what you should think about in the first place. The map in which you are a student of the university is a complex image. It tells you what to do every day, what to do in the future. And when an emergency situation arises, you get worse grades than you expected, you immediately give up the whole map.
And then what have you been doing for the last four years? How many of your goals have you did realized? What would you be if you weren't a student? This little bad grade is like a portal through which all snakes "get in." That's how we react. Especially if we open the doors too wide. One of the rules: it's important to limit the emergency to the minimum.
The same thing happens in a relationship: "I should never have married you in the first place!" "You've always done this and you always will!" Instead, you should say to yourself: "Okay, this man did something to break our common map. How can he fix it? We have to make a different plan so that it doesn't happen again. Or we should discuss it in a way that he knows he shouldn't do that. But I won't blame his entire personality."
Depressed people have a domino effect all over their value system. And then they say to themselves, "That's another reason I have to jump off the bridge." And they really see it that way because they have no protection. "I don't understand the subject - I get a bad grade in the exam - I don't get a diploma - I'm not going to be what I wanted to be - that's another indicator that I'm useless". If a person is depressed, every little thing hits him with full force.
When you make a mistake, think about how to interpret it as narrowly as possible, so that it leads to minimal behavioral changes to reduce the risk of repeating the same mistake again. This is the basis of psychological hygiene.
Your sense of importance is a physiological marker that indicates that you are on the right track, affecting all areas of life at once. Because you're trying to understand where you are in this life. I'm sure it's not easy for you to feel like you're doing it all right. But what we practice is involvement. Does that make sense and depth? Yes! This indicator serves many levels simultaneously: social and temporal. A sense of meaning is actually an instinct that helps people navigate through time and space. This is not a side effect, this is the most fundamental form of perception. It is the most optimistic thought one can have. A sense of meaning can be a guiding reflex. And that makes it real.
One of the destructive elements of nihilism in the idea that "no one cares what you do, it will not affect anything, your sense of meaning is an illusion". It's a powerful argument. But it can be false, because meaning is a real phenomenon that helps a person determine the right place between chaos and order.
How do you organize your life so that it really works?
What else would be good to work on to make a difference?
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