There are people you like but who are "harmful" to you, regardless of whether you have a serious relationship with them or it's just another affair.
There is a certain insatiable irresistibility in these people, namely they are supposedly close to you, but not close enough at the same time.
You love the moment when this man's/woman's name pops up on your phone. You'd do anything to see her or his sincere smile. When you're not together, you want to see the look he or she gives you.
But you look into her or his eyes and see a different reflection than the one you want.
You see in that reflection a sense of distance that tells you that he or she is not fully with you and will never be, no matter how much you want it.
He or she can say that you are beautiful and you will want to believe that because words make certain impression on us, they either hurt us or give us happiness.
Part of you is looking for the pain this man gives you. It is a confusing back-and- forth cycle associated with this person, you cannot stop coming back to him or her. You're still waiting to see a change in this man.
"Maybe this time it will be different," you say to yourself with stubborn naivety. You turn a blind eye to everything again.
You know perfectly well what's going on, what the consequences are and why it's bad for you.
You should know perfectly well the difference between those to whom you are priority and others to whom you are only an option.
Usually, common sense wins in the end, but it often takes a long time. Your emotions rub the naked truth right into your face, because you gave up too quickly before you wanted to hug her or him.
I suppose this can be perceived as weakness and emotional immaturity, which is true to some extent.
We're told never to agree to anything less than we deserve.
So why aren't we following that advice? Does the fact that we are tempted to give ourselves entirely to someone who doesn't appreciate us as much as we deserve make us less valuable?
Perhaps it just makes us more human and hopeful on the one hand and vulnerable and at the same time stubborn on the other.
We don't listen to our friends' advice, though we are quite aware of the harm caused by this long-awaited and most likely drunken kiss. All we need is for them to want us as much as we want them.
Causing pain is one of the most intimate experiences you can have with someone. It is to identify the strongest among us because we all have feelings and memories that we must let go of without much desire.But I believe that while you cannot control your feelings, you can still control how other people treat you.
We would like very much to believe that people can change for us, but we need to face the truth - it will never happen. It's important to understand it and accept it.
The question is how long you can tolerate all of this, and part of the solution is to understand your limits and your needs. It is not easy, but in the end, your happiness is in your own hands.
Some people, no matter how much we reach out to them, are not worth it.
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